Women Are Choosy Unlike Men

 I would like to share below with readers  an amusing Tik Tok video a friend sent to me in the  link below.  It is about an Indian wife selecting the best onions to buy from a crate with the husband besides choosing some for her which she rejected, and chose only her own. Finally, the husband, without her knowing it, picked up one the wife chose earlier and showed  it to her. But she rejected it, threw it down and chose another one of her liking.

https://vt.tiktok.com/ZShSYV159/

This Indian lady is like most wives who choses only the best vegetable or fruit in a basket from a seller in a market. If everyone does this, the fruit and vegetable seller will lose sales, as no other customer will buy the remaining "rotten" ones. Most wives do  like this Indian lady, choosing only the best ones from the basket or crate. Husbands may try to explain to their wives this practice is not good to both the seller and to other buyers, but their wives  would not listen - choosing only the best ones.  

 

This TikTok video I received reflects a brilliant segue from an everyday scenario to a critical concept in scientific research: selection bias and the importance of random sampling. The comedic irony of the wife rejecting the very onion she had previously chosen, simply because her husband offered it back, is not only amusing but deeply human. It also illustrates the strong sense of control and assurance some individuals feel when they are the ones making the selection themselves, especially in everyday matters like buying vegetables.

When researchers like us conduct medical or any scientific study in a population we normally take random samples to avoid bias because in a true population there will be a mixture of all types of people or samples. Thus if we chose only the "healthy" ones, then we are not selecting samples that reflect a true population. It is like in a bag with various coloured balls that represent the true population of balls inside the bag. We can't choose only red or blue balls and take them out of the bag and leave only the yellow or black ones behind. Then that is bias as we are not taking out samples representing the true population. This is statistics to avoid bias. 

So normally we are "blind" and do not choose. We take random samples such as in RCT (randomised clinical trial)  to reflect the true population of all sorts of people. This is the science, the science of statistics we need to very strictly follow when we conduct any research. We can't select only the good onions like in this video from the basket. Then who is going to buy  the bad ones left? That's why some fruit sellers do not allow customers to choose, and they are right. The seller normally will scoop up the fruits or vegetables randomly to sell, to be fair.

The analogy to randomised controlled trials (RCTs) and the importance of representative sampling was  excellently taught to us when we were postgraduate students. In science, if we only selected the "best" subjects, just as this Indian wife selects only the perfect onions, we'd misrepresent the real variation found in the general population. This leads to biased results and invalid conclusions. Fruit sellers who disallow picking are indeed acting from a practical application of this same principle: avoid cherry-picking (or perhaps in this case, “onion-picking”)

But how do we convince a wife not to pick only the best vegetables, that's a delicate matter! There are a few respectful suggestions I have that I think that may gently open her perspective without conflict:

Ideas to Convince Her (with Love and Reason) - Appeal to Fairness and Community: 

Explain how taking only the best leaves poorer quality produce for others, especially elderly or less assertive shoppers, who may then end up with only what’s left behind. We  can gently say to wives  "Imagine if everyone did this, the ones shopping after us might not find any good ones at all. It wouldn't feel fair, would it?"

Use the Scientific Analogy:

We could say, “When we conduct  medical studies, we take random samples so the results are fair and reflect the real world. Sellers are just trying to do the same, keep things fair for everyone.”

Empathize first, then suggest:  

Acknowledge her intent: “I know you're just trying to pick the best for the family, and that's really thoughtful.” Then, add: “But maybe we can let the seller do the picking sometimes. It saves us time and keeps things fair.”

Mention Seller Reactions: 

Sellers sometimes get upset when customers over-handle produce, and that might make her shopping experience less pleasant. Suggest trying the seller’s selection and observing whether the quality is really that different.

Suggest a Compromise:

If she insists on choosing, maybe encourage her to pick a few herself and let the seller choose the rest. A balance between control and fairness.

Of course, changing long-held habits, especially ones tied to a sense of care and duty, can be difficult. It might not work with logic alone, but with patience, shared humor (like this video), and gentle repetition, she may come around. Perhaps watching the video together and laughing about it might be the best first step, it opens hearts before minds.

Maybe it is women's intuition for the best buy - I really do not know. We men are not as choosy as women. We don't waste time choosing here and there. Women spends a lot of time shopping here and there, making their husbands wait till they have finished   

I have touched on this timeless truth that has echoed across cultures and generations: women’s shopping habits! Many husbands around the world would nod in agreement.  While we men often treat shopping like a military mission, "go in, get it, get out", many women treat it more like a curated treasure hunt, where intuition, detail, and care guide every decision.

There may indeed be something in women different from men -  a kind of intuitive discernment. Some women pride themselves on getting the freshest, best-quality produce, and often they're right! They may pick up subtle visual or tactile cues we overlook. To them, choosing is not wasting time, it’s optimizing for value. But yes, the waiting game is real, and  husbands have developed extraordinary patience standing next to vegetable crates, handbag racks, and sales counters…

Still, it’s a beautiful example of how men and women often balance each other: we bring efficiency, they bring discernment. Together, they make a great team, even if that team occasionally ends up standing in a market aisle for an hour!

If it helps readers share a light moment with their wives, you might gently say with a chuckle:

"Dear, I know you're choosing with love and care, but if I stood in the market picking onions the way you do, we'd miss breakfast, lunch, and maybe even dinner!"

Let  me help create a humorous short dialogue or comic scene from this scenario for fun to share with wives,  and all female buyers. 

The Great Onion Selection Showdown

A comic scene in one act

Scene:
A bustling morning market. The sun is up. Chickens cluck in the background. A married couple, Mrs. Lee and her husband Mr. Lee, stand in front of a large crate of onions.

Mrs. Lee:
(Squinting like a jeweller inspecting a diamond)

"Hmm... this one is bruised. This one is too round. This one has a wrinkle on the left side. Aha! Perfect onion number one!"

Mr. Lee:
(Yawning)

"Dear, an onion is an onion. They all cry the same when you cut them."

Mrs. Lee:
"That’s what you think. A good onion doesn’t just make curry, it makes magic."

Mr. Lee: 
"Magic or not, my legs are getting numb. Can’t we just scoop some with the basket and go?"

Mrs. Lee:
(Ignoring him)

"Shhh! I'm in the zone. I must hear the onion whisper to me."

(Five minutes passed. She has selected three onions and rejected twenty-seven.)

Mr. Lee:
(Muttering)
"By the time we finish, the price of onions might go up again."

Mrs. Lee:
(Gasps)
"This one’s flawless! The skin glows! I must have picked it in a past life!"

(She puts it aside while inspecting another)

Mr. Lee:
(Smirking)
"Let’s test something..."

(He slyly picks up the same "flawless" onion and offers it to her)

Mr. Lee:
"Here, dear, what about this one?"

Mrs. Lee:
(Revolted)
"Ugh! That one looks old. Who picked this?!"

(She tosses it aside without realizing it's her own pick from earlier.)

Mr. Lee:
(To the seller)
"Brother, please give us a plastic chair. We’re camping here today."

Fruit Seller:
"Sir, we call her the Onion Whisperer. She comes every Sunday."

Mrs. Lee:
(Triumphant)
"There. Six perfect onions. That only took... forty-five minutes. Let’s move to the tomatoes!"

Mr. Lee:
(Collapsing on a sack of potatoes)
"Just bury me here."

Moral of the story:

Let her choose the onions, dear brothers. But always carry a chair to sit and wait patiently,  and never, ever offer her back the same onion she picked. That’s a rookie mistake.

But women are like that!